Say what you mean!

I guess this is more directed at myself than anyone, so please don't read anything else into this. I guess at this point in my life I"m really frustrated with myself because I wish I could stay even, opposed to the high's and low's I've been experiencing for awhile. It is like I long for consistency and normalcy in life, so I cling to the people who I think are consistent and normal, while letting everything else slide. I will totally own up to the fact that some of the more close relationships I've had I've let slide, but that is because I get tired of always making it work. You know you get to a point when all you want is someone else to make an effort. I had a friend tell me to basically stop trying because I"m working to hard at it. (I wasn't to thrilled with that response, but maybe he has a point. I know his heart was in the right place.)

So what does it look like to give up. I don't know. I don't give up easily with things that I really want. I try to make things work. But maybe I make them work for just me and not them. I don't know. I don't know much these days. So if I'm not my "usual" self(which hasn't really been around)stick with me I'll be back sooner or later. :) Chin up I guess and keep pushing forward. Man when God calls you healing that is a much bigger thing than I thought or maybe wanted to admit.